"Bro, I knew somethin' was wrong when a little pretty white girl ran into a black man's arms. Somethin' is WRONG here. Dead giveaway! Deaaaddddd giveaway. Deaaaaadddddddddddddd giveaway. Either she homeless, or she got problems. That's the only reason why she's running to a black man!"
Uhhh.... yeah! She's a snicky. I mean, a wayward, pot smoking fiend of a snicky. With weird tattoos and an awful haircut. But don't give up on her yet. There's a lot of good raw material she's working with.
I don't care what anyone says, The Sopranos was and remains the single greatest television show in the history of television.
And don't call it HBO. Or cable. Or complain that networks aren't allowed by the FCC to do this kind of thing.
The broadcast networks have proven to be penny smothering cowards of the highest order. It's why the landscape is now left to nothing but CSI spin-offs and "reality" shows making stars out of complete nobodies.
But wait until they get smarter, faster, and are given artificial intelligence that allows them to "learn" and solve problems. They'll be crawling through our houses, peeling back our eyeballs, looking to give us a brain probe like in the movie "Minority Report."
Hell, these drones already have better hands than Terrell Owens did in his last 5 years in the NFL. And I am pretty sure they are currently smarter than Jerry Jones.
It's going to be a long awful future in this world.
Look, I know that quite often a gay man will give being straight a hearty "college try". And I get that he was dealing with a lot of mixed emotions.
But... damn. Eight years with Stanford women's basketball player Carolyn Moos before he decided he just couldn't keep up the lie?
To me, it looks like he was using her as a convenient beard, as much as he was trying to "sort things out." But hey, he's the Jackie Robinson of the cause, so I better not say anything less than glowing about him.
Writes Rick Reilly....
If anything, feel glad for Jason Collins that it's all over. All the hiding, all the lies, all the secrets. He had to hurt some people to keep them, starting with the woman he promised to marry.
"I'd mapped out my life completely," recalls Moos, 34. "I knew I wanted to be married, wanted to have children, live in this city, send my kids to this school. … I invested eight years in something. … To be able to recover from that is not an easy process. … But I'm glad Jason can be his own person now. I'm glad he can walk in his own shoes."
Collins is now the Jackie Robinson of gay athletes and, like Robinson, strong enough for the job. He's universally loved in the NBA. He's smart, funny and a wheelbarrow full of sunshine in the locker room. He only cares about defense, not scoring points, which is why he'll probably sign for one last season -- his 13th -- somewhere in the league this fall.
So here's a somewhat sticky question. Let's say an NBA team is very willing to sign this 2 point per game dynamo for next year. But let's say that the team is brutally honest about the fact they are signing him 80% because they "believe in the cause" and feel it would be a shame if he couldn't follow through and actually PLAY next year while being "active" and "out" in the NBA.
Would that be seen as a cheap publicity stunt and diminish Collins' "bravery?" What if that was still a team's true motive, but they just didn't express it so openly? Okay? Wrong?
I have no idea. I'll leave it to the Gay Jackie Robinson crowd to figure it all out.